


i'll try my best

by rxbron



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-21
Updated: 2017-02-21
Packaged: 2018-09-25 22:59:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 707
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9850598
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rxbron/pseuds/rxbron
Summary: aaron confesses his thoughts to robert after their wedding reception.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Hiya! I wanna apologise first for not uploading in weeks. I'm really sorry but I'm going through a rough patch with my health & life atm but I do have plans for future fics & new chapters. Just bare with me please! I wrote this a few weeks ago when I was feeling a little low so apologises again cause this fic probably won't cheer up anyone! I'm posting it now cause I'm feeling low again..I know the spoliers for the next couple of episodes aren't fantastic so let's hope emmerdale get their act together soon and give aaron some peace! 
> 
> *TW; Fic is based on Aaron's self-harm and it contains mentions of homophobia. *

"Robert?"

Robert stirred awake when he heard Aaron whisper against his bare chest and had stopped soothingly tracing the faint freckles on his stomach.

They were lying in bed after Aaron suggested the idea of “catching up in bed” after Chas and Charity began to take the spotlight on the karaoke at the bar. It was into the early hours of the morning when they had finished and were both now ready to sleep.

"Yeah?" He replied, quietly.

Aaron swallowed the forming lump in the back of throat, suddenly losing his confidence to speak. He was silent for about a minute until Robert called his name.

"I-I can't promise.." He suddenly said but then trailed off, tightly shutting his eyes. How was he meant to tell this to Robert?

Robert flickered open his tired eyes and glanced down towards Aaron, concerned.

"Can't promise what?" He encouraged him to finish his sentence, curious to know what he was about to say.

Aaron chewed his bottom lip, unaware of the tears forming in his eyes.

"I can't promise...I-I won't do...things." He murmured, knowing Robert would not understand him. The older man raised a hand to Aaron's shoulder and gave a soft squeeze.

"Things?"

"I-In prison.." He added before answering his question.

"I can't promise I-I won't...hurt myself..." Robert froze his movements, his heart shattering.

Deep down he knew Aaron couldn't promise that. He knew and he didn't want to ask him because it seem unfair and selfish and plus it was the last thing the younger man wanted to think about never mind talk about.

"Aaron-"

Aaron sat up to look at him, his eyes glossy. 

"No, I'm sorry. I don’t want to worry you. Forget I said anything, I’ll be fine." He quickly shook his head, pulling away from Robert a little and sitting up fully in the bed.

Robert frowned at him and sat up too, pulling the sheets around their lower halves.

"Don't be sorry, Aaron. I'm really glad you told me..." He whispered, kneeling behind him. He leaned down to press a soft kiss to Aaron's shoulder.

"I know it's going to be hard." He whispered, unsure what to say to reassure the frightened man.

"I'll tell you. If I-I do anything, I’ll tell you..." Aaron murmured, really not wanting to worry his husband.

Robert nodded and pressed another kiss to his shoulder.

"Thank you...but I want you to think about your future when you are out of there. You, me and Liv. Living together, under one roof. Quite exciting if you ask me.” Robert grinned at Aaron’s forming smile.

“You'll be out of there in no time, okay? There's no point in ruining your recovery over prison. You were just defending Finn and you let your anger get the better of you. It can easily happen. None of this is your fault, okay?"

Aaron nodded.

"I know but what if..." He trailed off again and turned his gaze down and away from Robert when the man moved to face him.

He continued, "Like Liv said...what they do to gay lads is...terrifying..." He whispered, letting a tear slip down his cheek.

"You know what they’ll say is not true. They are just scum with nothing better to do with their lives. Just ignore them, please. You can't let them get to you. It's not worth it, Aaron." Robert pushed Aaron’s damp fringe out of the way and held his the back of his neck.

"If it gets bad, I have a word or two with someone, okay? Nothing bad I promise."

Aaron chuckled at him.

"Don't get yourself into trouble, over me." He murmured, meeting his eyes.

"Your happiness and safety is my main priority, Aaron and if it means sharing a cell..." Robert joked, wiping away Aaron's stray tears. Aaron laughed softly at his joke, grateful he had married a person who could make him laugh.

"I will visiting you as often as I can, okay? Ring us everyday. You are not alone, Aaron."

Aaron nodded with a soft smile at Robert’s reassuring words.

"I love you." He whispered.

Robert took his two tear stained cheeks into his hands and kissed his lips, softly. 

"I love you, too."

**Author's Note:**

> Please feel free to leave kudos/comments!


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